The Original Post
AITA – Me (35f) had been planning on going to our local very large shopping centre all day. When I’ve finished work he’s come over and I gave him a 30 minute reminder, a 15 minute reminder and a 5 minute reminder we were leaving.
Once we left I asked him he brought shoes (ongoing dispute in our relationship) and he said no. I’ve told him countless times he has the choice to not wear shoes when we leave the house but I also have a choice to not have a part of it. I informed him I consider not wearing shoes in public a disgusting practice and he started accusing me of him insulting him and calling him disgusting. I reiterated I wasn’t saying that about him as a person just the act of going barefoot in nice very busy shopping centres. On the drive there I informed him he would be staying in the car because again, it was his choice to not wear shoes and now he’s accusing me of not wanting to be with him, not wanting to spend time with him and calling him disgusting. AITA?
What Reddit Said
Reddit was baffled by this entire relationship dynamic. Most commenters focused on the bizarre parent-child vibes rather than the shoe debate itself. The top comment pointed out how she’s giving “incrementally timed reminders” to a grown man and “informing” him of consequences like a mother disciplining a toddler.
However, Redditors also criticized the boyfriend’s stubborn refusal to wear basic footwear in public spaces. Many found his barefoot shopping habit genuinely gross and inconsiderate. Therefore, the consensus landed on “Everyone Sucks Here” with a strong recommendation to break up.
The Verdict
The overwhelming consensus: Everyone Sucks Here (ESH). This boyfriend refuses wear shoes shopping scenario revealed deeper relationship dysfunction beyond footwear preferences. Reddit unanimously agreed this relationship drama shows two incompatible adults who should end things rather than continue this toxic cycle of controlling behavior and defiance.
Original post from r/AmItheAsshole (2,085 upvotes, 1,653 comments)