Sister’s $2350 Bachelorette Party Too Expensive for Bride…
The Original Post
My sister is getting married this year, and for her bachelorette she wants to go to Nashville, TN (we are Canadian). The flights are ~ 800 CAD. The Airbnb she booked is $550 per person (7 people including her). The rest of the trip is expected to cost ~ $1000 per person for drinks, food, and activities. Further, she wants to go shopping and exercise classes while we are down there, and says if people don’t want to go they can do other stuff…
My sister and I are very different people and this is not at all what I would picture for a bachelorette party. I think she is asking way too much from her friends but they don’t seem to mind, except for her MoH who broke down and said she couldn’t afford this (and now my sister and her wealthy SIL are covering the cost for MoH to go).
This trip is absolutely not something I want to spend money on and it is beyond my means currently. I feel awful that if I don’t go, I’ll be the only one of her bridesmaids that backs out, and I am also her sister which makes me feel even worse about not going.
I gave her $500 towards her wedding dress already (which she barely acknowledged), the bridesmaid dresses are around $200 each not including shoes and whatever else we need to buy (wedding gifts, etc.).
How do I navigate this without damaging our relationship? I’ve thought about offering to give her $500 spending money for when she goes shopping in Nashville. Thoughts???
What Reddit Said
Reddit overwhelmingly supported OP’s financial boundaries. The top comment provided a perfect script for declining gracefully without damaging the relationship. However, many users questioned why OP was funding a wealthy sister’s wedding expenses in the first place.
Most commenters emphasized that true family members wouldn’t expect loved ones to go into debt for parties. Moreover, they pointed out the sister’s lack of gratitude for the $500 dress contribution as a red flag. The consensus was clear: financial responsibility trumps social obligations.
The Verdict
Reddit’s verdict was unanimous: OP should skip the expensive bachelorette party sister planned without guilt. This represents a classic case of family drama where financial boundaries clash with expectations. The sister’s wealth makes her demands even more unreasonable, and OP’s financial wellbeing should come first in any healthy relationship dynamic.
Original post from r/relationship_advice (1,006 upvotes, 420 comments)