Friend Too Big for Urban Exploring? Teen’s Honest Warning…

A 16-year-old invited his plus-sized friend urban exploring but warned her about tight entrance holes she might not fit through. She got upset and hung up on him, leaving him wondering if his “practical” warning was actually body-shaming in disguise.

The Original Post

Weird tile but I’ll role with it. So I (16m) was talking to my friend (15f), I recently have been getting into urban exploring and was talking about it with her. She asked if she could come at some point, it’s important to mention she is plus sized. I said of course, but there would be certain places she wouldn’t be able to go because the only entrances were very small holes or there were parts you needed to be lifted into. I didn’t say it in a way that was intended to shame her, I just stated it like above, she got upset about what I said, I told her it wasn’t meant to hurt her- I just wanted her to know for future reference, but she hung up on me and we haven’t talked since. AITA?

EDIT: I feel I should mention this: I didn’t mention her size just because, I mentioned it because of the her wanting to go to a specific place, and that one happens to have a very small entrance and several parts that are hard to squeeze thru- but because of that I mentioned it was something that might happen at several places. And I said that it was ok because there were many places she could go and I would take her there- just wanted to clarify for a few comments I got. But thanks everyone!! I really appreciate the insight and feel I have a better perspective now!

What Reddit Said

Most Redditors sided with the teen, arguing he was being practical rather than cruel. The top comment pointed out that getting stuck would be far more embarrassing than an honest warning. However, many acknowledged the friend’s hurt feelings were completely valid.

Users emphasized that good intentions don’t erase impact. Meanwhile, they praised OP for thinking ahead about safety concerns. The consensus was clear: sometimes the truth hurts, but it’s better than potential danger.

The Verdict

The overwhelming consensus: Not the Asshole (NTA). While the friend too big urban exploring situation was handled awkwardly, Reddit agreed safety trumps hurt feelings. This represents a classic case of friendship drama where good intentions meet sensitive realities. Moreover, most agreed that preventing someone from getting stuck in tight spaces shows genuine care, even when body image sensitivities are involved.


Original post from r/AmItheAsshole (1,356 upvotes, 630 comments)

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