I (25M) was having dinner with my GF(23F) last night and she was preparing a salad. As I was grilling the chicken, she was repeatedly eating out of the salad bowl with a spoon and putting it back in the bowl mixing around and such. This is a common thing that weve talked about before. I find it gross and bad manners to eat out serving dishes and put your used utensil back into the serving dish other people are expected to eat out of. Her family does it for almost every dish and if I see it, it grosses me out. I once again asked her to stop or to make herself a bowl and eat out of that rather than the community dish. She got bent out of shape, dismissed my concern, so I ignored it and carried on cooking the chicken.

When it came time to eat, she tried to serve me salad(With the same spoon she was eating off) and I politely declind. She then started pestering me why repeatedly. In attempts to stop a fight, I continued to cop out saying “Im just not in the mood for salad” and other excuses. Until she finally asked me enough to where I reiterated my concern that her reusing her dirty spoon in the bowl turned me off from eating it. She then played the victim about how she spent so much time preparing it for me and that I was being dramatic. She then left me with “If you don’t like that, you would’ve hated to watch me make the rice”. Which I had already eaten and now made me feel unsettled.

I was extremely frustrated in this situation because I feel like it’s a valid concern and general manners to not repeatedly eat from a dish others are going to eat from. Furthermore, I felt in a position to be forced into eating something that grossed me out just to validate her feelings while disregarding mine. I’m not bent out over a bite with a clean spoon. Or cutting off and nibbling on little pieces of dinner while preparing dishes. I just get grossed out by dirty wet utensils being mixed around into the clean prepared food everyone is going to eat from.

AITA