Husband Woke Wife for Toddler Duty Despite Being Awake

My husband and I have a toddler and both work full time. I work from home and he doesn’t.

This morning he woke me up and told me to go get our son. He was already awake and could’ve done it himself, which is why I got annoyed. Just because I work from home doesn’t mean I’m automatically on baby duty, and I was tired too.

When I asked why he couldn’t just do it, he said he’s exhausted from the week and then said “you wouldn’t know what that feels like.” That really pissed me off. I also work, I’m also tired, and I do a lot of the childcare and mental load.

We started arguing and I told him he is capable and that it feels like things default to me because I’m the mom and I’m home.

Here’s where I know I probably messed up. In the heat of the argument I said that I actually make more money than him, which I know sounds bad and probably hit his ego. I wasn’t trying to flex, I was trying to say my job isn’t less demanding just because I’m remote, but it came out wrong.

I also said this kind of stuff is why I don’t want more kids. That part came from feeling overwhelmed and scared of carrying even more responsibility, but I know that was a heavy thing to say during a fight.

Now he’s not speaking to me at all. I don’t know if he’s taking space or just shutting down, but the silence is making me question if I went too far.

I don’t think I’m wrong for being upset about being woken up when he could’ve handled it, but I also know I didn’t communicate well and probably escalated things more than necessary.

Where do we go from here? I hate the silent treatment…especially when i feel like I was provoked from the beginning.

TL;DR: Husband woke me up to get our toddler even though he was awake. Argument escalated, I brought up income and said this is why I don’t want more kids. Now he’s not talking to me and I’m wondering if I crossed a line.