Roommate Won’t Let Me Open Curtains Due to Sleep Schedule…
The Original Post
So for context I am living in a university residence. I share my bedroom with one other guy (two beds in a room). We also share the bathroom, but the kitchen is outside of the room and shared between all residents. Our room has a huge window, that let’s in lots of sunlight, but we also have very thick curtains that practically make the room pitch black if closed.
Now, the problem is that my roommate and I have very different sleep schedules. I want to sleep between 10:30 and 11.30 pm and wake up between 7:30 and 8:30 am. He on the other hand, goes to sleep around 6 am! To his credit, he doesn’t make any noises or disturb me in anyway during my sleep hours. I try to do the same, but it’s impossible!
He expects the room to be pitch black, absolutely no light. This makes it very hard for me to wake up, since I need sunlight in the morning to function. It also makes it very hard for me to eat breakfast or really do anything in the morning. He is also quite sensitive to noises, so my basic movement wakes him up. He expects me to wake up, get out of the room and let him sleep till 2pm! I expect to wake up, do my skin care, eat my breakfast and then leave all while having some light to work with! I tried to compromise by only opening the curtains a little bit, or using night lights instead, but he can’t tolerate anything.
He argues that he respects my sleep schedule why I don’t respect his. I argue that he is welcome to open the curtains or turn on the lights during the normal hours (after 8 am and before 11pm) but not within sleep hours. He has been threatening to not let me sleep if I don’t let him sleep!
Am I the asshole in this scenario? I don’t really want to bother him, but I also don’t want to wake up and live in the dark in the mornings because this dude is too lazy to fix his sleep schedule!
P.S: Mind you, he already uses sleep masks, and I only open the curtains a little, maybe 10 percent. But he still gets up!
Edits: I live in Turin, in northern Italy which means:
A. He doesn’t attend university classes because it’s not mandatory.
B. It’s a freaking cloudy city, it’s a little sunnier than London! So it’s not like we are in Florida and I am making him tolerate direct sunlight at 11am. It’s indirect sunlight in a cloudy sky at 7am.
What Reddit Said
Redditors largely sympathized with OP’s frustration but questioned their approach. Most pointed out the obvious solution: use the kitchen and bathroom outside the bedroom for morning routines. However, they acknowledged the fundamental incompatibility between the roommates’ schedules.
The top advice focused on seeking housing reassignment rather than continuing the conflict. Meanwhile, users noted that both roommates were trying to be respectful within their constraints. Therefore, this wasn’t about one person being malicious but rather a practical housing mismatch.
The Verdict
The consensus leaned toward a soft YTA (You’re the Asshole) for not using available alternatives like the kitchen for breakfast. However, Reddit emphasized this roommate different sleep schedules conflict requires a housing solution, not blame. This represents a classic case of college roommate drama where compromise isn’t enough and living situation changes become necessary.
Original post from r/AmItheAsshole (1,109 upvotes, 548 comments)