Sister-in-Law Demands Pregnant Woman Save Baby Name for Her
The Original Post
My husband and I (mid 30s) are expecting baby number 2. We have a 2 year old son already and are expecting a daughter. My SIL (husbandās sister) has a 3 month old daughter and is not planning on trying for another baby for a few years. Weāve been honest about the baby names we like when asked and our top baby name currently is a pretty popular name (top 10 and has been in the top 100 for a long time). My SIL told us last week that our top name is the girls name she has always loved and planned to use for her future daughter. My husband asked her why she didnāt already use the name since she already has a daughter and she said her husband picked her daughterās name (not sure if this is true) but the name weāve picked is the name sheās always wanted to use. Sheās asking us to pick any other name from our list and save this one for her. She has no emotional connection to the name at all, itās not a family name on her side or husbands side. However, it was my great grandmothers name. We didnāt pick it for that reason and my great grandmother died before I was born but when we told my mom the name she got emotional because it was her grandmothers name. I thought that was special so that is one push for us to want to use it over the others we liked. Our other reservation to āsavingā the name for her, she doesnāt know if she will ever have another daughter so it seems silly to save it. If she was currently pregnant with a girl I would maybe be slightly more receptive to a conversation about this. Sheās been making a lot of noise about this to other family member and weāve gotten calls from my in laws and my husbands aunt giving us other name suggestions and trying to get us to pick something else. My husband is adamant that weāre not changing our minds and doubling down thatās the name, which we hadnāt even fully 100% decided, it was just a strong front runner. But hearing all the noise from family Iām starting feel guilty so Iām wondering AITA if I use the name? Truly regret ever sharing our list with anyone at this point.
What Reddit Said
Reddit users overwhelmingly supported the pregnant woman in this family naming conflict. Most commenters emphasized that an actual pregnancy trumps hypothetical future babies. Moreover, they pointed out that cousins sharing names is completely normal and not worth destroying family relationships over.
However, many Redditors also criticized OP for sharing baby names before the birth. The top comment received thousands of upvotes for stating the golden rule: never reveal names until they’re on the birth certificate. In fact, this situation perfectly illustrates why that advice exists.
The Verdict
The overwhelming consensus: OP is Not the Asshole (NTA). This sister in law wants baby name drama represents a classic case of family boundary issues. Therefore, Reddit advised OP to stick with her chosen name, especially since it honors her great-grandmother’s memory. This type of pregnancy drama shows why family members shouldn’t dictate naming decisions for someone else’s child.
Original post from r/AmItheAsshole (1,573 upvotes, 384 comments)