I’ve been traveling in Chile and had been sick for a couple of days before this. Vomiting, GI issues, and generally feeling awful.

Because of that, I barely slept for two nights beforehand. I kept waking up in our hotel bed to run to the bathroom, and my girlfriend knew this since she saw it happen.

We had a long travel day planned and ended up taking a 20-hour overnight bus instead of flying. The flights available were expensive, poorly timed, and uncomfortable. Many would have had us arriving around 2:30 a.m., and being stuck upright in a plane seat while sick sounded miserable compared to being able to lie flat and shift positions on a bus.

I paid extra for a luxury overnight bus with fully reclining lay-down seats, blankets, and pillows so we could rest. On the day of travel, I was still feeling rough but slightly improved. We spent time going to multiple pharmacies for medication. She wasn’t feeling great either, but her symptoms were much milder than mine.

Once on the bus, I decided the best way for me to recover was to sleep. I took sleeping pills so I could rest and feel functional the next day. I offered her the same pills, knowing they would likely help, but she refused. I then slept for roughly 16 hours.

I did not know she was upset during this time. She never woke me up, and I wasn’t aware there was an issue until I woke up in the early afternoon near the end of the ride, when she was sleeping.

When she later woke up, I tried to hold her hand, but she was clearly upset. When I asked what was wrong, she said I had “abandoned” her by going to sleep and that she had been alone for the entire bus ride.

From my perspective, I was sick, severely sleep-deprived, and trying to recover. I didn’t ignore her intentionally, refuse to help, or know she was upset at the time.

So AITA for sleeping through most of the bus ride instead of staying awake with her?