The Original Post
Background: I (39/M) have a 17 year old stepson. His father passed when he was 6, and Ive been in his life since he was 8.
A few months ago, he came to family dinner and started talking in this funny nasal voice. we laughed, thinking he was joking around, but he got upset, saying we werent accepting him.
This was the firat he claimed he had multiple personality disorder. Short story: My wife and I absolutely dont believe him.
We talked to his therapist (he had been seeing one since his father death), and the therapist knew nothing about this, but doubted the claim. my stepson then asked to go to 2 different psychologists, who also said they disagreed with the claim. My stepson then started refusing to go to therapy unless we find him a therapist who agrees with the claim.
Looking into it, we found that he had started following all these multiple personality/DID “influencers” a few weeks before he started claiming he had it.
My sister in law supports this, and we decided to ignore it, hoping it was some weird phase.
Over the past months, he has really started weaponizing his self diagnosis. He skips chores saying it was a different personality, has started vaping and gets mad when we punished him, as he claims it was a different personality. he has been suffering in school and skipped some classes, all of which he blamed on the other personalities. My wife and I pushed back, and he completely denies responsibilty.
He and some friends are planning a road trip this summer. When he mentioned it, I said he wasnt allowed to go. If he is truly as unaware of his actions as he claims, theres no way its safe. He responded saying he would be an adult. But I pointed out that if he is dealing with this mental illness we could and should put him under legal protections.
He is really unhappy about this, but it seems logical to me. I told him to regain trust Id want him to delete social media, have his online access monitored, go to some intensive therapy, drug testing and start taking responsibility at home and school, with guidelines. My wife thinks I am going far. My in laws believe his self diagnosis and say I am harming him.
So AITA for restricting the things my stepson is allowed to do because of his claimed mental illness?
What Reddit Said
Redditors overwhelmingly supported the stepfather’s approach. Most users appreciated the logical trap he set. If the teen truly had no control over his actions, then restricting his freedom was the responsible thing to do.
However, some commenters noted the stepfather’s restrictions might be excessive. Meanwhile, the majority praised his “you can’t have it both ways” reasoning. In fact, many users pointed out this was a perfect example of consequences meeting manipulation.
The Verdict
The overwhelming consensus: Not the Asshole (NTA). This stepson faking multiple personalities case resonated with readers who recognized the manipulation tactics. Moreover, Reddit appreciated the stepfather’s logical approach to calling out the inconsistent behavior. This falls squarely into family conflict where boundaries needed to be set against manipulative behavior.
Original post from r/AmItheAsshole (3,196 upvotes, 550 comments)